ZeeGeezer

The Dildo Speaks!

So even though this is all pathetic and depressing, at least some words are being posted. Actually, I feel much better today than I did yesterday. Probably because some guy on Silver Daddies wanted to hook up with me last night. I demurred because I'd just eaten a gillion cookies and was feeling less than lissome. But it made me feel better. And I might hook up with him tonight. So far none of the other potential dates from the various dating sites I'm wasting my money on has actually materialized. Not the skinny Jewish guy from Palo Alto who sounds nice, nor the chunky dirty-ish guy from up the road who seems hot. But I am just a cock-eyed optimist, so I keep trying, keep sending carefully worded missives out into the ether, and keep hearing ... nothing at all. I wish I knew what the secret signal I seem to be sending out is.

Did I tell you bothall that I hooked up with AsianPrimePharmaJim last week? First time the Geezer's sowed any oats since the great GBF débacle. And it was nice. He's awfully nice. No rancour over my having just abandoned him a year or more ago. Not many strings (and those only of my making). But I haven't called him since. I should, but Christmas has been in the way. Mind you, he hasn't called me, either. And he's in this long-distance relationship. With a guy in Toronto. Many frequent-flyer miles have accrued in the past year, apparently. So I don't think I'm much more than a highly realistic dildo in this triangle. A dildo that sucks, as it were.

PharmaJim and I hooked up a few times back (or maybe just the once) at the end of 2003 and into 2004. But as my thing with Johnny developed, I unceremoniously dumped him. Then, at the beginning of the month, I sent out a mass email begging for donations for my ALC ride. And PharmaJim (who's still in my address book) donates $100 and sends me the nicest email, saying that he'd like to see me again. So, we played telephone tag for a bit, and finally end up talking on the phone. Would he like to come over? Sure.

Will I put out for $100? Sure.

Yesterday I paid Sistopher's cellphone bill (($950!!!). And fed him leftover gumbo and leftover trifle. If this bequest he's getting is some complex fantasy of his, I'll be so thoroughly fucked. And not in a nice way.

Oh, and I got a Christmas card from the GBF.

Grey like the weather

I hope my two readers had a nice Christmas. Mine was really quite miserable. The grey and miserable weather didn't help. I spent pretty well the whole of the 4 days with Sistopher. Mainly he slept. Awake for an hour, asleep for two or three or four. I cooked. I was bored. I was lonely and unhappy. I spent an extravagant amount on groceries. And it wasn't all that nice. OK, but not spectacular.

Christmas Eve: gumbo with chicken, shrimp and andouille. Made with home-made stock and fresh okra.

Christmas Day: roast lamb, new potatoes, brussels sprouts, roast parsnips and sweet potato. Shrimp cocktail to start. Classic sherry trifle for dessert.

Boxing Day: Left-overs from Christmas Day.

I did get 1 Christmas present, from The Chiropractor, a mediterranean cookbook, which is lovely and which made me cry. As did almost every movie we I watched. Jack Nicholson says he loves Shirley Maclaine in whatever that movie is and I cry. It's not the sad parts that make me cry. Sat their like a stone when Debra Winger died. It's people in love that gets me. Or just kissing. or whatever.

And now I'm sitting at work trying really hard not to cry. Do you think I might be just a tad depressed?

(Sis needed to pay his rent by today. He didn't say it, but I expect there's an "or else" there. Presumably December's rent. I can't help him out. And his phone's been cut off. And his internet isn't working (cut off too?).) If his phone bill's not too big, I'll pay it.

"If you could have any car you wanted ..."

Sistopher has apparently been left a large sum of money by someone he can't remember ever having met. I keep thinking it must be some old trick of his, but he denies the possibility, since this guy would have been in his 50s when Sis was in his 20s and Sis is quite sure he never hooked up with anyone as old as that. Sounds like a plot device from a cheap novel, doesn't it?

"Large" in this case is well into seven digits. 8 years of his last salary. 27 years of my current salary. Which is bizarre. But nevertheless it's the kind of thing I've come to expect to happen in his life. Karma works much more potently in his life than it does in mine. So, just as he needs the money money most, it comes to him.

And he does need the money. He has to have heart surgery and his insurance carrier has decided it's a pre-existing condition so they aren't going to cover it. Don't get me started on the deviousness of health insurance companies. No, get me started. Apparently the insurance company is able to weasel out of this because Sis took out the policy before his CORBA coverage from his last job expired. If he had waited, then the insurance company would have had to cover the condition. So by doing what seemed to be a good thing, getting separate coverage in good time, this will cost him something over $100K.

(Mind you, if I were an insurance company I'd be reluctant to take Sis on as a risk, too. You name a surgical procedure, he's had it)

But this windfall is way more than is required for the surgery. So he's apparently thinking about buying me a car. I think I'd rather have the money in the bank, but that doesn't seem to be an option . So given that he's going to buy the car, what car do I want? I've told him that he should get a Mercedes CLS500 for himself, it being a very pretty car. But for me, I can't decide. I'm quite happy driving the Venture van I inherited from my marriage. It's practical, cheap to run, reliable. And I don't spend a lot of time worrying about the impression I make by what I drive. But the van is now almost 7 years old and will soon need major work (transmission, brakes, etc.) and I'm not in love with it. I I don't want a Mercedes; I don't like the statement it makes (in Silicon Valley, the main statement seems to be that you are an asian lady of a certain age). I rather fancy a Subaru WRX Sportwagon. But is that being too modest? You couldn't pay me to have an SUV. Except just maybe the Escape Hybrid.

Later: I've decided. I do want a small-ish wagon. The roominess of the van has proven it's usefulness time and again, so why not keep with a roomier vehicle? (it's notable that when the Missus bought a new car this past summer she bought a wagon too). Refined, a little bit luxurious. Classic understated good looks and substance. Age-appropriate, but still a bit sporty. Not a dyke's car. Not a nouveau-riche car nor a wannabe car. So, it's going to be the Audi A4 Avant. Maybe with the bigger engine, certainly with the automatic transmission. With a roof rack to carry bikes.

I cooked a nice dinner yesterday for Sis, the Chiropractor and fiancé. Way traditional - ham, scalloped potatoes, asparagus. Moroccan-spiced butternut squash soup to start. Chocolate mousse to finish.

That's cool,dude

Referring to the recent reduction in hours imposed on himself and several colleagues (myself included) a colleague today said "I haven't been laid off; I've been laid back"

Cock-eyed

Today's horoscopes:

Aries

In a weird way, you feel like you're picking up where you left off two months ago. Plans to get further education, or to travel in the future (perhaps even now) are starting to excite you. Since the possibility of earning money looks more positive now, these ideas might take wing!

Taurus

Things seem to be back to normal, or at least the way they were in September. You've been spinning your wheels for a while, and a bit obsessed with ex partners and old relationships. There are still a lot of details related to shared property, insurance matters to clear up. You can do it.

Seems accurate. Not that I have any travel plans. But I think the being down in the being-dumped dumps might be passing.

[I can read both Aries and Taurus, since I'm on the cusp, as they say. So I do, and pick the one I like best]